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	My mother and father are divorced. Both have agreed to pay a portion of our wedding costs. My mother lives in another city about 2 hours away from my fiancé and I. As our wedding plans progress and services are being reserved I am needing money for deposits. As willing as my mother is to help with these costs she is unwilling to send a check until she 'sees' what she is paying for. Because of her busy schedule she is seldom available to travel the 2 hours to see for herself and we are running out of time. How can I let my mother know that she is adding stress to an already stressful situation without hurting her feelings and having her withdraw her offer to help financially?	Submit your answer to this question

	do you own a camera? photograph your choices. explaining the added stress while giving a solution of sending photos of reception hall, cake choices, etc. this may make the news a little easier to handle and also give you visuals while continueing the planning.	hampton va

	Why not make him one of your attendants? It is perfectly acceptable in this day and age for a bride to have a male attendant. He can be your honor attendant and stand next to you during the ceremony, or if you already have a maid of honor in mind, he would stand at the end of the row of ladies. Just don't give him a bouquet! Odds are, he'd rather stand on your side than your fiance's anyway.	Woodsville, NH

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