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Traditionally these are the expenses paid for by the Bride or her family:

• Attire for bride and her mother
• Ceremony fees
• Flowers-bridesmaid's bouquets, floral arrangements for ceremony and reception
• Gifts for bride's attendants
• Gift for groom
• Groom's ring
• Invitations and stationery
• Lodging for her out-of-town attendants
• Musicians for ceremony and reception
• Photographer
• Reception (site, food, liquor, rentals, etc)
• Transportation for bridal party to ceremony and reception
• Videographer
• Wedding Cake
• Wedding Coordinator fees

Groom and his family traditionally pays for:

• Attire for himself and parents
• Flowers: all boutonnieres and corsages, bride's bouquet and going-away corsage
• Gift for bride
• Bride's ring
• Gifts for his attendants
• Honeymoon expenses
• Lodging for his out-of-town attendants
• Marriage license
• Officiant's fee
• Lodging and transportation for groom's parents
• Rehearsal Dinner
• Bachelor dinner, if there is one

Attendants pay for:

• Their Attire
• Travel costs
• Gift for bride or groom
• Wedding gift for couple
• Organize wedding shower(s)

This division of expenses comes from standard etiquette, some of which is now considered out-dated. Here are some suggestions for ways to divide up the expenses:

• Split the wedding costs equally among the wedding couple and each set of parents.
• Contributing relatives pledge whatever amount they would like to/are able to contribute. The couple works within this budget, or covers any additional expenses themselves.
• Contributors select the items they would like to pay for. Perhaps the groom's parents would like to finance the photography and bar costs, while the bride's parents will pay for all other reception costs and the couple will take care of the ceremony fees.

Other things to be aware of:

Traditionally, the bride's family is considered the "hosts" of the wedding reception, and the groom's family hosts the rehearsal dinner. If you are breaking from this tradition, you may need to adjust accordingly, such as including the groom's parents names on the invitation if they are contributing significantly to the ceremony or reception costs.

Also, often when people are helping to pay for the party, they want to have more influence over the planning. You must decide how much of your autonomy you are willing to give up if the people financing your wedding are trying to take it in a different direction than what you want. You may need to have very clear conversations with all involved about what you want, and where you are willing to compromise. If it comes down to receiving the money only with strings attached, you may want to consider paring your plans down to an event you can afford without their help.

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